Lessons learned

If I have learned anything in forty years, it is that Trudy has be my greatest mentor on living honestly and simply.  I tend to live in the gray areas of life, looking for all the exceptions to the rules. I complicate things so as to make decision harder.  Trudy has always been straight forward and gets to the heart of the matter. She is the one who taught me that love is not about me.  It is about the one you love.  It mean paying more attention to them than yourself.  If you are truly taking care of your partner it frees them to take care of you. 
Of course this must be mutual or it could lead to an abusive situation.  In a truly loving relationship this kind of caring frees you to be you and to be open with one another.  It allows you to be vulnerable, humble, and forgiving.  I know I can share my fears and my joys with her because she cares about me.  I can focus on her because I know I am cared for.  We have certainly had our ups and downs, times of real, difficult, and painful issues. But Trudy's courageous love has helped me through those times.